About a month ago, I went to spend a weekend at my friend’s chalet in the mountains. It was a wonderful weekend full of laughter. Whenever we go to the chalet we don’t really sleep. The guys like to party! I asked another friend of mine to bring her special marinated red peppers that she makes from scratch at home. They are really delicious. I also asked her if she would mind bringing me decaf coffee because I am sensitive to regular coffee. I have many food in tolerances and always bring my own stuff, but did not have time to get the coffee this time before heading up to the chalet. After I asked her to do this though, I felt guilty. I forgot to tell her I would pay her back for the coffee. As I was invited by someone else from the group, I was also worried that maybe I had insulted the hosts. I felt afraid my friends would think I was a spoiled brat.
My friend ended up not buying the decaf coffee either. She said that she didn’t have time to get it. This made me feel very bad. However, if you look at the situation it is a bit ridiculous. Why should I care so much about what other people think? Did I do something so wrong? No, I have some food in tolerances and I forgot to bring my decaf coffee. I also asked my friend if she would mind bringing some and had full intention to pay her back.
Later I spoke to my husband. I was surprised to find out no one was mad or thought worse of me in any way, including my friend. In fact, my husband told me everyone said I dealt with everything very well, and complimented me when my husband and I met them later at soccer. So what was I feeling guilty about? This is how the mind distorts reality and tries to create a false perception where the situation is very different from what you think it is.
How many times have we consumed ourselves with guilt over an entire day or days and for what? When you do this to yourself, you are hindering your personal wellness for something your Black Octopus, (the Ego), created. It does not help you in any way. All it does is take away your joy. Sometimes you may feel so guilty about something, you may attract others to behave in a negative way towards you. I remember one day I had to go to the hairdresser. I felt very very terrible that I was late for my appointment. She made me wait a very long time and when I mentioned this, she explained herself by saying to me;
“Well you were late.”
I learned at that moment when I feel very guilty, other people will reflect back to me my own negative energy. So how can you overcome these feelings of guilt? Here are some questions you can ask yourself:
- Why are you feeling guilty? Is there a good reason for you to feel this way?
- How is feeling guilty benefiting you?
- Is the situation serious or trivial?
- What can you do to release this guilt?
- When you feel guilty, what self-talk can you use so you can feel better?
- What action(s) can you take to let go of the guilt?
- What new perspective can you use when you catch yourself feeling guilty?
- Do you think other people really remember everything you said or did?
The next time you feel guilty, use these questions to help you. I personally connect with my higher self when I use them and I ask the spirits to help me release any negative feelings. I am then able to see the situation differently. I also find when I do this, the next day or a few days afterwards, I will uncover some information on the internet on how to do what I need to do with a video, a seminar, or I simply find an answer which pops up in my mind and feels like an aha moment.
So remember, when the feeling of guilt starts emerging and it is very strong, think of those questions and remember this quote: “Guilt is the source of sorrows, the avenging fiend that follows us behind with whips and stings.”-Nicholas Rowe How do you feel when you are faced with the feeling of guilt? What are some situations in your life that make you feel guilty? I would love to hear what you think. I warmly invite you to leave a comment below. Your comment can inspire others.
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